Kinda Lame

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D’OH – Chevy Sonic Missing Break Pads Upon Shipping

Seems like a bonehead mistake, of gigantic proportions. Chevrolet has shipped their 2012 Sonic without break pads installed – no big deal. Oh, wait, we need those in order to keep from careening into intersections full of people and/or car? Well crap, let’s get to the dealer. No wonder it was $500 off, they just sold us a kit, not a car. Some assembly required I guess. Given that, we assume, most cars are made with robots I’m not sure how this would have happened – oh yeah, the robots aren’t aware that pads need to 101% be installed. If maybe, I don’t know, people still put cars together someone would have caught the mistake. I’m sure the guy who worked the assembly line for 40 years (and knows more about your car than the guy who drew up the blueprints) would have stopped production before such a deadly product was shipped. And they say we need tort reform? I think this shows we need something, anything, to keep companies on their toes. Not that we need to sue Chevy all at once now. Not at all – but if they weren’t worried about lawsuits I wonder if they’d ever give us break pads? It sure doesn’t seem like something on the forefront of their mind. Can’t wait to see The Consumerist get a hold of this one.

Here is what SlashGear had to say, the source (for me) of the story…

We’re pretty certain that someone at General Motors is in a whole heap of trouble this week as its been discovered that a batch of their Chevrolet Sonic cars with missing brake pads have left the factory and were sold in kind to unsuspecting customers. While these missing pads aren’t currently being rated as something so fatal that GM is recommending a total instant freak-out on the part of car owners, if you are one of those owners, you probably should bring your car in to be checked. Nothing like cruising into grandma’s house for New Years and finding yourself on the other side because you brakes just… you know… aren’t there.

via 2012 Chevrolet Sonic recalled due to missing brake pads – SlashGear.

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As I grew older I drank less at times and found that during other times I was much smarter about drinking (throwing up less) and when I put my mind to it I could consume amazing amounts of alcohol. Amazing. Amounts. During a period after there loss of a close family member I would host a weekly drinking competition – which I won and have a certificate to prove I won – but to mask a developing problem. That has passed as the loss became easier to bear, though I still have the certificate (the same one used in classrooms awarded to children for winning the math competition no less, which to me is still ironic).

Now at a young age I could drink almost any kind of beer and didn’t drink much liquor. I did develop a taste for the gin & tonic, but typically drank what everyone else was drinking, whatever beer brand we all wanted to pitch in on. Given a choice and with the help of my steady drinking buddy I would select the glorious, golden delight that is named Old English 800. Eight ball, Ol’ E. Or as I called it, “The Malted Fantasy”. Not to be cool, not to be an ironic Hipster. I wasn’t trying to be Eazy-E – I took the advice of someone who was a serious drinker, who lauded Ol’ E, and tried it.

I also drank, due to price, a lot of Keystone Light. On my 30th birthday I even pledged to drink a 30-pack of ‘stones… and didn’t fulfill that obligation. At all. But I did try. Looking around at beer drinkers though you’ll notice a love for Anheuser-Busch products. Budweiser, Bud Light – these have to be the top selling beers in America. Though, I don’t even care to double check that assertion.

As time has progressed, starting back at about age 25, I found I could no longer drink more than one Anheuser-Busch product. Sometimes before I finished a 12 oz bottle I has a splitting headache and it felt like my ears were closing up. Then there were the yummy microbrew beers. I couldn’t drink any. I even had to leave a dinner party early once after drinking half of a beer.

Hard liquor doesn’t, for the most part, have the same effect. Sadly I have developed a taste for wines as I am now a bit more mature (and have someone to enjoy them with, someone to guide me in selections) and I can’t enjoy them either most of the time.

The first solution was to not drink. At my age, in my part of town and trying to be social this is almost impossible. Even in my previous job we couldn’t celebrate a success without tossing back a few (well, it was either drink or eat a ton of expensive and trendy food). The magical solution that I discovered later was Miller Light. I have had other Miller-Coors beers, and have had no adverse reactions, but I will typically avoid them on taste alone.

Miller Light has become a staple for me. Not that I’m drinking all the time, because I’d rather not, but if I want a single beer before bed after a long day or am looking for something that goes with a meal (who can not drink a beer while eating my own BBQ chicken? It deserves a pairing) I buy and reach for one thing… Miller Light.

Now, before you think my intent here is to laud Miller and put down the other brands I should be clear. I wish I had a choice. Some festivals only sell Bud. Some stadiums make you walk a half mile around to find something other than the beer that sponsors the team. At some parties where the beer has been purchased for the guests in advance – your favorite type of party, don’t lie – there is no real choice for me in sight. I find it common too that Anheuser-Busch has locked bars into exclusivity contracts and you can only get their beers out of the tap.

Sometimes you just have to suffer.

No. Beer. For. You.

And wine? Forget about it. Someone wants you to try a glass of expensive wine made in 1941, which the Nazi’s stole most of and there are only five bottles remaining? Endure the soulcrushing headache to come or turn it down.

Though, I may have found a solution.

There are a few things you can be allergic to in regards to liquors. It can be mold as a byproduct of the yeast used in fermentation. Anheuser-Busch beers are high in the byproduct and changing the formula would change the taste – fair enough, the majority of Bud drinkers might revolt. With wine it could be the sulphites – though this doesn’t seem to be my issue, per the above description. And there are other issues, such as wheat or gluten allergies, but you’d know if that was the case.

Now … I should have started by saying I’m not a doctor and I don’t intend here to give any sort of medical advice. And this is, of course, a medical problem in nature. So run this by your doctor first or do your own homework. But if you are like me and find that most beers and wines are off the menu – try an allergy drug (OMG other than benedryl!) to curb the issue. I have tried the over the counter Claritin (Walmart brand, which, scares me because I had no idea Walmart had a drug company division). Claritin didn’t work. Last night I tried it for the first time and I woke up 4 hours into sleeping with the most horrendous headache and stuffed up nose. And I didn’t drink that much at all.

What has always worked well for me though, which I recently discovered and used to drink a half bottle of wine after a night of wine tastings, was Zyrtec. It did require me to take it again as a headache began to develop again later in the evening, but I was golden. I didn’t wake up crying for my mother because of intense pain. Which is always good.

Go ask your doctor, look it up, and let me know in the comments if it works for you or if I’m going to die because of it… whatever. Seems that this is something that bothers a lot of people and it would be nice to hear about ways to beat it other than abstinence. Because abstinence is boring.

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After dealing with an ongoing issue for 10 years I’ve come to the conclusion that has become one of the lamest experiences one can go through – losing your hair. Personally, I have no problem with it. Hair and my teeth, that’s what I always say, let them fall out. Two less things you have to brush in the morning. Losing your hair, as a man, unless you are one of those freaks who doesn’t, is just a part of life and aging. There is no need to feel bad about it. Please be sure to take action if it gets out of control though – I know a man (honestly) who has the hairline and shape of Bozo the Clown. Somehow he still gets ladies, so it really doesn’t matter much I guess.

What has become incredibly lame about it is the suggestions that people make or conversations that really don’t need to happen. I feel like a celebrity at times. You know how people probably try to play the Kevin Bacon game with Kevin Bacon? It gets really old. My favorite suggestion is to stop wearing a hat. “You wouldn’t lose your hair if you didn’t wear a hat.” Well, you wouldn’t know if I never took it off. Not only do people automatically assume they are the first to impart these words of wisdom but they think you care. I’ve never once replied “You know, I never thought of that! People should pay you for that type of advice – genius! You are an absolute genius, please write books, humanity would be better off”.

And how dare people? Maybe it is an obvious comeback but could I go around telling people it’s probably the pastries and fried chicken that was making them fat? And as a balding person I have the same attitude of the morbidly obese in America – I could care less. Stop bugging me about it. Can I point out the blemish on your face shaped like Italy – because that’s all you are doing – making me self conscious about something that up until that point didn’t bother me at all. Luckily the feeling of inferiority washes away and I’m back to being happy about other things.

But this is the root of such comments I guess. People can sometimes only feel better about themselves when they point out the flaws of others. C”est la vie.

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I was inspired by the original Vengeance Dad meme and AwkwardFamiyPhotos image, have a look at: “I TOOK HER, MINE NOW”

I Took Her, Mine Now

Credit for the original image goes to Awkward Family Photos, Thinking of Me. Someone should contact her, I think she’s single fellas. Who doesn’t want a piece of that?

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Charlie Sheen says the focus on his latest escapade is not worth media attention, especially with all that’s going on. Not because he’s embarrassed, not at all. It’s not the stories about porn stars, suitcases of drugs – it’s the principle of the situation.

He told eonline.com via text message about the rumors swirling about him, “Believe nothing. I will never speak about any of this as long as I’m alive. You’re all gonna have to keep towing the same redundant line, guessing wrong.”

“BTW, two wars are in an endless state of sorrow. Egypt about burned to the ground, and all you people care about is my bulls***?”

“Shame shame shame.”

Sad thing is, he’s right…

via Charlie Sheen thinks the media focus on his troubled life is pathetic | AHN.

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Lil Wayne is a Cheesehead?

Despite claiming that he’d one day carry New Orleans on his back the Martian Lil’ Wayne has recorded a very interesting freestyle ahead of Super Bowl XLV for Green Bay Packers fans, such as himself, to enjoy. Posted first on his blog WeezyThanxYou.com it has started making the rounds to other sites like Rap-Up.com (where I found it linked to from Twitter). A good friend said the song was decent, I think the lyrics are lame (“I’m a cheese head, ya’ll *****s cheese whiz”). Listen or download the song below and judge for yourself;

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Download Link – Lil Wayne Freestyle – Green and Yellow

In other Exciting News… Monkeys Facepalm

Mandrill monkeys (they look like baboons, more info at link) have begun using the international sign of disgust to avoid social interactions. The Evolutionary Biologist studying the behavior has called it a monkey “Do not disturb” sign, holding the gesture for periods to avoid other monkeys (not a bad idea).

But why are they doing it? It’s unlikely that they’ve found something stupid on the Internet. Nor are the mandrills trying to block out light. They’ll make the same gesture in the shade or under overcast skies and only a third of the facepalms happened in direct sunlight. They’re not trying to wipe anything away, for the facepalms can last for as long as 17 minutes.
Via Discover Magazine – Monkey see, monkey facepalm

Teenager Creates Solar Death Ray, Threatens Governments Worldwide

Harnessing the power of over 5,000 suns (not yet 9,000) a 19 year old has created a death ray in the spirit of solar cooking devices built by survivalists and environmentalists. Though not exactly as effective as you’d want it to be the project is pretty cool and the only thing lame about it is that he actually spent the time to make it. Check out the YouTube video below, welcome your new laser wielding overlords!

Errata…

In other lame news, Earth is not “in another Solar System”. Thanks Gizmodo! Seems that when they aren’t stealing phones they have some (obvious) reporting value.

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This story caught my eye because they put torrent in quotes, like torrent sites don’t exist;

For those of you too busy downloading the entire Beatles catalogue to check out entertainment news, the second-to-last “Harry Potter” movie debuts Friday.

The first 36 minutes of the film are already online, circulating on a number of “torrent” sites, which help users download sometimes- pirated media files. The leaked chunk of the movie is raising some interesting questions. Among them: Will the film actually do better because a portion of it has been leaked online?

One blogger goes further, asking if Warner Bros. Entertainment, which made the film and shares a parent company with CNN, leaked the clip on purpose

“Warner Bros. Pictures is usually none too fond of leaks, especially if a film gets out before it premieres in theater,” writes Ernesto, editor-in-chief of the site TorrentFreak.com

The TorrentFreak editor doesn’t realize, I guess, the extreme amount of correlation between a movie being distributed by Warner Bros. and the likelihood it will show up on torrent sites before being released. Now I didn’t say causation – I’m not going to just say that Warner does this – but it seems odd. Then it seems odd that the news organization who is also part of their parent company would be running this as one of their top stories.

I’m just going to suggest that they may not have leaked the beginning of the movie – but they want you to go out and find it, watch it and want more. Because this is the perfect trick to pull on Potter fans. They won’t be happy with watching even half of it – and if the fans are not sure if they want to get out to see the movie some leaked footage is a great way to have them salivating for more. If it’s good enough – and God damn do people love their Harry Potter.

If I had a dollar for every Warner Bros. screener I’ve seen offered online I’d be a rich man. I think this is more of the same, guerilla, viral marketing. Otherwise they wouldn’t be pushing a news story on it – they might have kept quiet.

Quote and story via CNN News (who is in the umbrella of companies that Warner Bros. is also a part of..) @ http://m.cnn.com/primary/_nzxmS3-in6b0iFBoA

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“dankando: Back to school sale for stay-at-home parents http://twitpic.com/33qynn

–http://twitter.com/dankando/status/29646257823

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A realization;

The more barbaric the world seems, the more likely it is you have to resort to violence to prove yourself

In other words; when people are idiots you have to act like an idiot to communicate with them.

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Of all places in the world - Christchurch, New Zealand was hit today with a 7.1 magnitude earthquake. Because I’m an American I had no idea that, as Wikipedia puts it, “The Christchurch urban area is the second-largest in the country by population, after Auckland.” I don’t care, I still think the whole things is ironic given the name of the place. I don’t think they will garner a lot of donations.

According to reports;

The quake was felt widely across the South Island and as far north as Wellington and Palmerston North.

Power is out to most of Christchurch and rural Canterbury, and the central city has been closed down by police because of the amount of rubble in the streets. Water pipes have ruptured and there are reports of flooding in some eastern Christchurch areas.

As many as 1000 residents from Christchurchs seaside suburbs may be evacuated due to flooding from broken water and sewage pipes. Civil Defence said a decision would be made shortly on whether to evacuate residents from New Brighton to Aranui or Linwood High Schools.

Emergency services have rescued about 10 people from holes in the ground including a person who was trapped in a pit in River Road after the ground collapsed.

via Chch state of emergency – national | Stuff.co.nz. Also see residents’ reactions to the quake from stuff.co.nz.

See this twitter search for possible updates from people inside the area of Christchurch.